Just a thought –
A reality which no one wants to talk about…
As I look back, I can say I am much better than a lot of people and blessed by the grace of Almighty Allah. BUT we, as girls (daughters), are only told to be thankful and look at others.
Why? I don’t say I am not blessed or I regret any decision in my life, but being in my forties; where I have spent half of my life and as no one knows how much life span do we have, Where do I stand as a woman, as a wife??? What did I achieve in life for my own sanity????
Living in a joint family system since childhood, I only saw my mom and dad doing everything for others; to make others happy. My mom spent most of her life pleasing others, BUT what did she get in return??? Now in this old age when her kids are dictating her what to do, how to do, and what not to do???
So, the conclusion- the son from all the siblings, who is willing to take the responsibility of his old parents is the only one who is stressed all his life. His wife and kids suffer in one way or the other, sacrificing all their life, pleasing everyone and still one can’t make everyone happy.
Their time to enjoy and bloom as a couple never comes. The wife who is willing to do everything for her in-laws doesn’t get her own time to spend with her hubby… They are only the problem solvers.
No one understands this feeling of loneliness and emptiness a wife faces all her life. She is only told to look at others and be thankful as her hubby and in-laws are much better than many others… WHY???
That poor girl is not being unthankful BUT something is missing in her life which she can’t explain to anyone as no one could ever understand or even try to understand…
It’s not that the girl is not willing to take any responsibility or doesn’t want to be with her hubby in difficult times, especially when the parents are old and there is no one else other than her hubby to take the responsibility of the parents. She always tries her best. It’s only that some have more patience and stamina, and some are not emotionally very strong. The problem arises here…
Somewhere in one way or the other, that girl is only longing for many important things missing in her life:
The decision-making power
Bonding with her hubby and kids
Time from hubby when there is no other family member between them.
And most importantly, to have her OWN HOME where she can do everything independently, where no one is dictating her, judging her, and doing comparisons.
Well, these are her RIGHTS as a woman and as a wife.
Unfortunately or maybe we can say this is the life cycle. When she gets her own home where she can exercise her authority, enjoy her own time with her hubby, unfortunately, there is an unfilled gap between the couple as they can’t understand or handle this too as they have spent most of their life doing everything for OTHERS.
This time comes soon too when their kids are old enough to tell them what to do and what not…
Life goes on BUT that feeling of something MISSING always remains there which no one understands… 😞
Life is a blessing and we should be thankful for what we have as many others must be facing more problems in life as compared to us
Something remains missing.