Marriage pressure from society or parents? That is quite a debate!
This article is coming from a girl in her mid-twenties who is a dreamer and a believer. A dreamer? Yes, because I have certain goals that I want to achieve. A believer? Yes, because I believe when the time is right, everything will fall into place. It saves me from worrying and keeps me motivated.
We often blame society for pressurizing us and driving our actions, but do we realize we are the society? We say people are not good but do we realize that we are the people? We say the times are not good but are we adding any value to time? Each person plays a part in society, and it is about time we adopt the live and let live strategy.
Imagine you are having a rough day at work and receive a call from your mom saying, “XYZ is getting married, and I am extremely worried for you. If you like someone, please let me know.”
“No mom, this is not cool. I am not ready for this conversation yet. It is not even coming from you, but because someone told you about XYZ’s marriage, you are trying to pressurize me to get married as soon as possible.”
This is what I mean when I say societal pressure to get married leads to family pressure, and it is not normal.
Let us consider another example, you are living your life to the fullest, and there comes some random person who asks, “Why are you not married yet? Is everything fine?”
No, you don’t get to make life difficult and inconvenient for someone by questioning like this. Instead, expand your horizon. I don’t understand when people will realize that it is not ok to ask such marriage-related questions that are quite personal.
Sometimes I wish I could tell people how they don’t pay my bills, I am not a liability, and I am not even answerable to them. If only they could mind their own business! Maybe as I am growing older and wiser, I can sense sarcasm. Gender-based pressure is evident, and I cannot even share how I feel because I don’t know how society will take it.
Wait for a second, why am I still concerned about society? Because society puts my family under peer pressure and then my parents think it is okay to pressurize me to get married.
Women in Pakistan are incredible when it comes to keeping up with societal and family pressure with grace. It is not easy to juggle work, life, university, and friends & family commitments every day. In the process of keeping up with everything, we often forget to keep up with ourselves. We forget how important it is to take care of our mental and physical health. We forget to spare ten minutes each day for ourselves. Not every person we meet is concerned about us.
As a woman, I would conclude by saying that we all deserve freedom, peace of mind, and happiness. We must continue to chase our dreams and not mold our personalities to meet societal expectations because the day we get into any trouble, this society will turn its back. Let our strength, courage, and choices define us.
Do share your thoughts in the comment section.