Anonymous Bahu #01 Struggles With Susrali Issues – Episode 02 (07-07-2020)

Continued from Episode 01

Incident at first meetha time:

Now the other thing that happened was that I had to make my first meetha so when I went in the kitchen, she told me that she had already made a meetha. I was like, “Seriously?” Then she told me that I could make shahi tukrey for the first meetha the next day. The next day, I was all happy because I knew how to make them perfectly. So the next day when I went in the kitchen, she told me that she knew a new recipe and that we would make it accordingly. I agreed. When I was about to deep fry the bread slices, she told me not to. She said, “We will only toast the bread and will pour the milk over it.” I was a bit hesitant because I already knew the bread would soak the milk and it would get soft, and exactly that happened. She served it saying that I (her bahu) didn’t know how to cook, so this is how I made my first meetha! This episode made me really upset but I didn’t utter a word!

Meddling continues – kitchen and cooking:

Then after a few days my husband asked me to cook something delicious for him. I told him I will make karhai for him; again my specialty. And then again my saas came and started bossing around. Telling me, “We don’t use these many tomatoes. We should not add that much of masala and salt is not good for health,” so I would have to keep it minimal. I was patient and quiet. She was standing on my head just to see if I was doing things accordingly or not. and when I served it, it was okayish but not great… I didn’t know it was all done to make my husband’s mind that I didn’t know cooking, so when the time came of continuing my housejob because I had been on leave, they decided to shift with us to Karachi. Before my marriage my MIL & FIL used to live in Hyderabad and my husband and BIL used to work here in Karachi. And yes, after my honeymoon my husband had joined his office in Karachi. He used to work on weekdays and come back on weekends. I used to live with my MIL and FIL so I forgot to mention that with all these happenings – time to time, she was otherwise very sweet to me on my face.

Now we all shifted to Karachi. I got to know I was pregnant and I continued my housejob. All this while, she (MIL), SIL and BIL were doing their best in creating misunderstandings between us. They would open my almira and take pics showing him (my husband) how I keep my things. I used to get off on Sundays only and we didn’t have a maid for washing dishes. Taking advantage of this my MIL used to take out every possible utensil she could use! She being all sweet to me would say, “You don’t need to cook.” I told her, “I can prepare dinner,” but she said, “No you need rest.” Once on a Friday, I came from work early as I wasn’t feeling well. She told me that today I would prepare a meal. I agreed. She handed me the chicken and found Korma Masala and some fried onions. I was very sure now I could make a perfect meal and I finally did. At the table my MIL said, “Yeh to dabbai kay masalay sai banaya hai. Tumhari kya mehnat? Apnai maslai sai banati to phir baaat hoti.” As usual I kept quiet…

Pregnancy with depression:

Going on pregnancy checkups was another story. She used to go with me to every single appointment and every ultrasound. In every appointment, she used to say that I didn’t eat much. I don’t feel hungry. She would ask the gynecologist to please prescribe me medicines so that I eat well. Then the Dr. suggested to eat in intervals, if I couldn’t eat at once. When we used to go home, my MIL would forcefully try feeding me a two adult person’s meal – all at once, and when I couldn’t she used to say that I didn’t care about my unborn child and that I wanted to kill her and what not… 

Every now and then my MIL used to make a big issue out of small things and would go to Hyderabad saying she won’t come back and my husband being all mommy’s baby would shout at me, get angry with me and then I had to manage everything on my own. She used to make sure I didn’t have enough groceries to make something special for my husband because my husband, who was always treated like a prince in his house, couldn’t go and do grocery… All my pregnancy I used to go into depression. 

After these long fights where I saw my saas shouting, husband shouting and everyone accusing my family saying that they were trying to break our family (Which was the other way round), I had pregnancy induced carpal tunnel syndrome and sciatic nerve pains. When I used to tell my husband about the pain, he use to tell it to the whole family and then my MIL used to make an issue out of it saying, “Aik do kam kiye nahi haath main dard hogaya, paon mein dard hogaya.”

Bahu’s birthday – gifted with maltreatment:

Then it was my first birthday after marriage and my MIL created a big issue and went to Hyderabad saying, “She won’t come back.” My husband tried stopping her. As usual I was asked to stop her and apologize. And this time my husband told me, “You go to your mom’s place and you won’t come till my mother comes back!!!” I was in a state of shock – five months pregnant and hearing this!!! I just asked him, “What do you mean by this? What’s the status of our marriage right now?” I went in complete shock!!! I didn’t know what was happening around me. I was just crying and crying. Then my husband saw me – not responding at all! He then realised which state I was in. He then tried to relax me, but I wasn’t able to control myself and was crying. Then he finally relaxed me. Sat me down, made me have dinner which I vomited. It was Ramzan and then I made Sehri for my husband. The next day my BIL came back. Then I had to make Sehri and iftari and then dinner separately for them. I used to make special food in every meal to make sure they both understood that I knew how to cook and that I could do it, but all in vain. 

On the day of my birthday my husband called my family and asked me to go with them. I told him I didn’t want to, but he forcefully sent me with them. After reaching home I contacted him. He wasn’t replying – not attending my calls. I then started calling my MIL, FIL, BIL but no one was picking the phone.

I started getting panic attacks. I asked my father to call my FIL to which he told my father, “You guys have to come and talk to us!” When my parents went there. A long list of complaints was waiting for us! 

After all these complaints and everything, my husband messaged me saying that I needed a punishment for what I did… my husband being the prince of the house didn’t even go for any lab tests with me. I was taken to hospital check ups and everything by my saas n BIL. I used to actually crave having a husband-and-me time, but no we didn’t get any cause.

To be continued… Episode 03

Published by SS Editorial Staff on behalf of an anonymous author